A New Year is upon us.

Well I have gotten Christmas done. Not put away yet, but the hustle and bustle is all done. Now it's time to get down to the nitty gritty. Yup with a New Year there comes "resolutions". I don't like the word "resolution", I like the word " goals". I love the thought of setting a target and trying your hardest to reach it. Sometimes my targets/goals are totally out of reach, and totally unattainable. ( really, at my age and situation, do I really think that I will be landing on the moon anytime soon. Not likely.) So like the rest of the world, I try to set goals that are going to make me better, healthier, smarter, faster, stronger and just a well rounded individual.
I looked back at my goals last year and well, I don't' think that I accomplished a lot of the them. In fact I don't think that I finished any of them. So with a New Year comes new resolve. I'm going to get at least one of my goals done. Just one, that's all I need.
For Christmas I got a lot of calendars. I love the calendars, one was made by "Bear". All the months have art work that she had put together in school. Love it. Another is a family calendar that my dear sweet sister in law put together. I opened it up and realized just how much I miss my family. I will keep it where I will always be able to see it. Then I got another calendar to help me stay organized. It's got a lot of space so that I can write things that are important. You know get the zoo here and there, make dinner, remember to breath you know simple everyday stuff like that.
I sat down to today and got my menu figured out for the whole month. Yup you read right, a whole month. I'm sooooo looking forward to getting cooking. Plus, "gasp"! The Pioneer Woman is on Food Network. I just found out. Maybe I'm the only one that didn't know, but I'm soooo very, very excited. So to pay homage to this news, most of my menu is taken from her. So this is what I'm making this coming week in January.
Monday--Roman Style chicken (Giada De Laruentiis)
Tuesday--Wild rice and cheese skillet souffle ( cookbook from a dear friend)
Wednesday--Chickpea/beef/ veggie stew ( cookbook and slow cooker recipe)
Thursday--Meatloaf ( my own creation, which is very good, not to toot my own horn, but toot toot)
Friday--Fish Stew ( very country french)
So that is the meals for this week. I'm so very excited. I will take pictures of the all the meals and let you know if they were good or not.
That is the goal setting for right now. There are more but I need to sit and think somethings over. I need to make sure that the goals are not just good goals but better goals. And of course things that I can accomplish.

Well I have not been on here for a while. I have had a lot of things to do, and as you can see my computer is in pretty rough shape. The 'G' is not the only key missing and the space bar does not work all the time either. I was going to see how long I could write this with out using the "G" but I have not succeeded. And if I could write with out spaces it would go so much faster.
So this month has flown by. Christmas is almost upon us and I have really done nothing. A wedding is done (yay). It was beautiful and the two are very happy. School Christmas parties start this week and so does the ward party. So much to do in so little time. I think that I have gotten most of my shopping done but I really have no idea, the baking has fallen by the way side and my house with it. And to top it all off, we have no snow. I know I should be happy. But it does not really feel like Christmas with out just a tiny bit of snow. Just to get me in the mood. What I really need to do is get off my broken computer and start baking. Yup that is exactly what I'm going to do. Go bake something nice. No really I'm going to go running ( cause I have not done that in a while either), then bake something ( so I can eat it, remember I just ran), then clean my house, feed the hungry, cloth the naked and end world conflict. Now that is just the mornings activities. HAHA! really I'm going to run inside on the hamster wheel. Probably not bake anything and waste my time on Pinterest. This should be a productive day. HAHA!

A Good Day!

Look what I found on my front step. Yummy! My favorite. Salted Caramel Hot chocolate. That made my day. Everyone loves getting surprises. That just made my morning on this cold wet day. Now to keep the momentum. I get to chat with a good friend today and make good choices. I choose to be happy today. I choose to pass it on. Do you remember the show Evan Almighty. I thought it was pretty cute. God told Evan to build an ARK. Now that is a hard task to build an ARK. Later on we find out that all of us are asked to build an ARK ( acts of random kindness). We do all have the task to build. So I'm going to start doing what I have been asked. Acts of Random Kindness. It can be anything from a text ed saying " have a good day" to little notes in the mail ( who does not like little notes) or like an angel this morning, dropping off a Starbucks at someones front door. OK world, watch out here comes an ARK. Ahhh, now that you all know, forget that it was me who told you. And don't be surprised if you get something. Duh. Now I've really told everyone. Man I hope Jedi mind tricks work over the Internet. HAHAHA!


As you can see the chocolate did not last long. YUMMY!

The power of sisters.

Everyone should have sisters. I love mine, they are kind, thoughtful, spiritual, loving, silly, warm, sometimes fuzzy and always know what to say. I have had great moments with my sisters. Since moving away from them I have had a void. But I must say that I now have found a whole handful of sisters. These women would drop everything to help, they would cry with me, laugh with me, sometimes laugh at me. ( I'm not very graceful) I love my new sisters just like the sisters that live so far from me. I had an experience with one the other day. She sent me a beautiful talk. It was truly amazing and I was touched that she thought of me. I knew the talk was for me, for in the first few sentences my favorite scripture was quoted. How beautiful and lovely the mysteries of God are. She is a very inspired women. With all that is happening in her life she has time to think of me. She is a dear friend and sister.
As I was thinking about sisters, I was thinking about trees. I know totally random. I was thinking about the little trees that sometimes I see that are growing in the strangest places. I'm sure that you have seen them. The ones growing from cracks in rocks. Growing in the middle of wind and sun scorched deserts. The ones that grow where it would be impossible to grow. I was thinking that I was like those little strange trees. All alone growing in the most impossible climates, on the steepest cliffs. Well I opened my eyes. I was not a lone little tree. Struggling to find purchase in the environment I was given. No, I'm in the middle of a forest. My roots have been in tangled with the other trees around me. I thought about that. My roots are not reaching for purchase in sandy soil, rocky terrain. My roots are reaching for security and safety in the roots of the other trees around me. That is way when the winds and torments of the weather arise forests don't move, yet lone trees sway and break, and ultimately die. I opened my eyes and saw all the sisters standing round me. They are the trees that I'm talking about. I'm in a forest of strong, amazing and spiritual women. I'm in a forest of regal saints that I get to call sister. Their roots are strong. Their roots have knit together through service, prayer, laughter, tears, heartache and joy. I don't stand alone, I stand in the presence of giants. I'm intertwining my roots. When the storms of life rage around I know that I will not be blown over. I am in a forest of strong women, my roots may not be as deep as others right now but we are weaved together and together we will weather life. My mother, my sisters, my sister friends they stand by and give support. Not to forget the amazing man who stands by me and has grown with me this far and forever. He is my greatest support, my greatest cheerleader, my greatest friend. I opened my eyes and saw his. I'm so thankful for all the Lord has placed in my forest. Thank you.

P.S. I have not read the book that is the picture. Sorry

Had a great day yesterday!

So I thought that I would write this earlier in the morning so that I don't forget my epiphany. A couple things before I rain beauty and clearer understanding in your life this morning. ( HAHA ya right, it's more like you already know things and a mud puddle, but it seemed clear to me). So to start things off, I made my bed. Yes you heard me I made my bed. Now for some of you that is no big deal. For some of us who may have some morning get going struggles. This is a huge accomplishment. It's so easy to leave the bed unmade, so that when you feel down or sad you can just crawl back in, pull the covers over your head and try to forget that the world outside is still turning. Having a made bed takes more effort to get into. Try it for your self. Then you will understand. There is some kind of beauty that comes from a made bed. It's like you got something together even when things are falling out of the sky around you. So YAY me, my bed is made. Now onto the meat of the post.
I had a great day yesterday. Gator Girl invited me for lunch. It was fabulous. She is so talented at making things look so pretty, and effortless. Not to mention she is fabulous and gorgeous and just brings sunshine in your life. You know one of those people that they just have to smile at you, not even say a word and your day is so much brighter. Well, we did lunch. It was so fun. I had no animals from the zoo with me. It was just Sandy time. No mommies were in sight. ( I love being a mommy, but sometimes we need a break.) She made a fantastic lunch, so tasty and the conversation was inspiring and life changing. To me it seemed like the worlds problems were solved. Of course we figured out how to end world hunger, how to achieve world peace and do all great things in the world and still look fabulous and accessorized. Haha, naw but to me it changed things. Our conversations were inspired and it made me look back and contemplate some things. One, I adore so many people. I find strength in seeing the wonderful strength in other people. In knowing what wonders they perform, no matter how great or small. Was just in awe of some of the great women that we both love. They are meek and humble sisters. I love them
Two, I need to look into the mirror and see what my Heavenly Father sees. This is a hard task. I would love to black out a mirror and just leave a strip visible. A strip where when you look in the glass all you see are the beautiful eyes looking back. None of the other stuff we fill our heads with, just the eyes. And I really want to look. Study those eyes, let the eyes study me back. Truly our eyes are the windows to our souls. If we can get past all the "fluff" that we surround ourselves with. All the nonsense and noise, I'm sure that our eyes will tell us things that our brains don't understand. I'm sure they will tell us and show us where we came from. The glorious life we had before earth, learning at our Savior feet. I'm sure that they would tell us of the strength and power that we possess. I'm sure that they would show us that we are literally daughters of a King and that we are entitled to all that He has. I'm sure those eyes would shake the enemy that we all have waiting to destroy us at every turn. There is much power in our eyes, we just ( OK I just) have to learn to get past the "fluff" and look at my eyes.
Third, my lunch uncovered many scares that I have. ( not literal scares, I do have some of those) but spiritual and mental scares that I thought I so expertly hid, under layers and layers of bandages. Yesterday, I removed those bandages and you know what I found. I still have those scares, some are deeper then others, but they are healing. They don't seem as deep and horrible as they did. Some are still fresh and sore. They still hurt constantly, but some are almost healed. All that is left is the mark, but that mark is something not be scared of. Something not to cover up. It is a battle wound that I bear proudly. Or I should bear proudly. It is a healed scar that may just help someone else who has the same scar, but much newer then mine.

Yesterday was a good day, no yesterday was a great day! I was touched by love, tickled with laughter, I was re bandaged with sympathy and lifted up with kindness and compassion. Yesterday was a great day, I want to make today even greater.

BOO!

It's All Hallows Eve time again. Did it seem to anyone else that we just did this. I recall it was not that long ago. It's amazing how quickly life is going by. Thanksgiving is in 3 weeks and Christmas is right around the corner. And do you think that I am ready for any of them. Nope! I just bearly got this day done. I was still running around this afternoon trying to get all the odds and ends wrapped up. And I don't even go all out at Halloween. Imagine how crazy I would be if I did. You think I'm crazy now, man I would hate to see me then. I must say that this is not my most favorite holiday. I don't know why. Why is that? I loved Halloween as a kid. What kid wouldn't. One you get to be someone that your not. How cool. I get to be Superman. Awesome. Okay for me I was usually a downhill or cross country skier. If you knew where I grew up you would understand. So really my costume looked no different from my winter coat. But man I thought that was the best. Funny thing is, the people handing out the candy would know exactly what I was. " Oh look, Another skier!" Haha I wonder how many skiers folks got in my neighbour hood. Second thing. You get to ask for candy, and the adults gave it freely. There was no wondering if this time I ask for sweets will I get it. Nope this day you got as many sweets as your pillow case ( we didn't have cool bags like kids do now) could hold. I remember getting it so full that I could bearly carry it. I mean it was only maybe half full of the candy that you really wanted to eat, and the rest was just garbage. Do you remember those candies that had the orange wrapping and the witches on them. You know the ones I'm talking about. They would taste horrible and indefinitely pull out any loose teeth that you had at that moment. Those always were the last thing in the bag. ( sorry for all of you out there that liked those candies. Wish I knew you when I was young we totally would have traded). So as a child I loved Halloween, now not so much. I love the kids excitement as they try to figure out what to dress up as. But you all know what is going on in my head. I have to make what! I have to find what! I find it a total nightmare. Now maybe if I was as talented as a dear friend of mine who make all her kids costumes. They are amazing. Really good looking costumes. But alas I totally procrastinate and don't seem to have time to get the costumes done. Sorry my little zoo mom is lame. I just don't get into it. Then I think of all the money that I'm spending on candy that I have to give out. ( man I'm totally cheap). Nah I just see all the candy that will be in my house that I will eat. Cause I have no absolutely no self control when it comes to fun sized chocolate bars. Really I rationalize that I can have 3-4 bars. They area just little and it's not a full chocolate bar. I know that we have all thought that. Don't kid yourself.
So now I'm handing out the candy that will be back in my house times five. (All the pillow cases the zoo will bring back) I will have to find in myself some form of control so I don't end up being the example to the zoo on what happens when you eat too many sweets. I then I have to do it all again next year. Which remember is going by so fast. And that is why Halloween is not my favorite. Maybe this holiday is a test for me. Well friends, I'm failing miserably. I have already down 2 bags of reases pieces, a york patty, and I'm eyeing the whoppers. Man I totally fail. ( I'm excited to see what the zoo brings back, man I'm a total failure. Hahaha!)
Happy Halloween, May your treats be sweet and your tricks scary.

It's been awhile.

It has been a long time since I last posted and I have felt somewhat sad. I have not thought of anything witty or profound for awhile and maybe that is why I have not written. But it's time to pull myself out of the dumps and start spreading some sunshine. Even if I spread it here to myself.
I'm tired. I'm tired of trying and failing to keep my house clean. I'm horrible at it. Really,this is not a strength that I have. Some people are amazing at it, well not me. So I'm just tired of looking at my house and seeing my failure. Not fun. I'm tired of waking up so dang early to get Trout off to school. Don't get me wrong I love our time together in the morning trying to talk about what is happening in her day ( both her and I are not morning people) and then when we are waiting for her ride, we snuggle up together under a blanket. I love doing this with her I just wish it was later in the morning. I'm tired of measuring myself next to other people. There are tons of people who are better then me and I have to stop beating myself up for not being like them. ( Ah, look at comment no.1 cleaning my house). I look at others and feel that I'm totally inadequate or doing something wrong. You know that days, I'm tired of it. I'm tired of just being tired. I have tried everything to not be tired. I work out and love it, ( is that not supposed to give you more energy?). I'm totally drained by the end of the day. What am I talking about I'm drained just sitting here typing after having a nice long morning nap. Man I have a problem. I want to be supermom. We've all seen those women. The ones that are head of the PTA, run marathons, have a perfectly clean house, the children are all straight A geniuses. And they are like the energizer bunny. They keep going and going. Well I don't think those women really exists. That women if she is doing all of this is crying in her bathroom every night with exhaustion. She is this close to snapping and having a breakdown. And she feels just as rotten and worthless as the rest of us. So I'm trying to look at all the good things that I do. I think we all need to stop and write down the things we do well. We don't have to do them perfectly or all the time, but the things that we are good at. And what we like about ourselves. I think then we will see just how great we really are. OK so now it's time all of us pull ourselves out of the dumps and spread some sunshine to those we meet today.
On the lighter side. I had a wonderful weekend. It was my birthday. Not just any birthday, a very special birthday. Kangaroo and I share our birthday. She was born on the same day that I was. Now I must admit that at the time of birth I was not very thrilled about this birthday gift. This gift was painful, and a lot of work. But everyone around me was telling me how wonderful this was and does not happen very often. I'm thinking to myself "Yay me! Now give me some drugs!". Well time has passed and sharing a birthday is really special. It's something that we have that no one else does. It's our special day together. Really she's the one that celebrates and I do all the work to make it wonderful. HAHA! But this birthday was amazing. Kangaroo turned 8, yup 8. And on her 8th birthday, on the day she was baptized. How many of us can say that. That on our actual birthday we were baptized. And then to be able to say that on my birthday and baptism day I wish my Mom Happy Birthday too. Now swap it for a mothers view. On my birthday I helped be a creator with God. I suffered pain, immense pain to give a beautiful daughter of God life. On my birthday I held a soul so clean and pure that only moments before I'm sure was held by our Savior. Eight years later I helped that little girl open the gate to return to her Father in Heaven. And then on my birthday, watching her father on earth baptize her, held a soul so clean and pure as the day she left her Father in Heaven. It brings tears to my eyes. I had the most amazing birthday. I will never have a day like that again on my birthday, and on her birthday too. Thank you to all who made her day possible. Her grandparents for raising her parents and teaching them the gospel. Thank you to those who teach her at church. Thank you to those that welcome her into their homes and love her like one of their own daughters, and Thank you to my Heavenly Father and Savior for sending her to me on my birthday, and teaching me how to raise her. It was an awesome day, I'm so thrilled to have this beautiful memory.
Now something funny.
Mom: "Hey Bug how do you get milk from a cow?"
Bug: (Hands on hips with hip to the side)" You walk up to the cow and say HEY COW GIMME SOME MILK!"
( I thought that was hilarious)

I'm a Mormon!

I have cupcakes in the oven, for "Bear's" birthday party tomorrow, so I thought that I would take some time to write a little post. Last night Daddy Warbucks and I were sitting in the living room being boring. ( That happens alot at my little house. We don't get out much, or at least not invited lots. I think it's due to the fact that we own a zoo. Just a hunch. You all should be feeling bad now. Haha. Just joking, we love our boring hum drum life) So anyway. I was reading about the I am a Mormon campaign that the Church has put out. I love it! If you have not seen it yet I tell you right now. Stop reading my ramblings and go to mormon.org. Then don't forget to come back. I'll miss you. Watch the little clips about normal people who are Mormon. I watched some last night. These are not ordinary people. These are extraordinary people. Some of these people have and are going through cancer treatment with a young family who depends on them. Some are blind, some are Olympic athletes, philanthropists, Singers, Bloggers, Military vets etc. But the glimpse into their lives shows that they are normal ordinary people. I sat on the couch thinking of the video they would make about me. Hum, I live in my pj's ( not very inspiring), I run to get away ( that does not sound inspiring), I hit the proverbial wall at about 8:oo pm every night.
I make due with what I have or I make due without. ( Or I just whine to Daddy Warbucks and he tells me to suck it up princess).So of course the train running through my head was one of self pitty. Not that I want to be sick, or be an army vet. An Olympic athlete that would be cool. I don't want to be blind, and opera singer that would be fun. I just thought my life would be something worth watching a short video about. Maybe not so much. Of course Daddy Warbucks always ruins a good pitty party. ( that's what I love about him). He reminded me of the wonderful things that my life has. I have 5 wonderful animals that I love very much. They are healthy, smart, kind and I think pretty cute. I have a wonderful husband ( That is what he reminded me over and over about. haha). I have a nice safe house and community. I have an awesome group of friends that I count as my sisters. I have a family that accepts me for my forgetfulness. I have a God that loves me. My life looked better and better. The Adversary wants us to think that we don't measure up. Well you know what, we do measure up. We surpass the measuring tape. There is nothing that we can not obtain. He's that one that did not measure up. He fell short. Not me. Yes I'm still working at it.Everyday is a struggle. I don't laugh and sing, run through meadows of wildflowers with my hair streaming back in big curls, and the sunlight hitting every angle of my face perfectly. I wake up like the rest of us. My hair so scary that Medusa would turn to stone. The traces of yesterdays makeup still lingering from a not so good clean job. Breath that dragons wish for. And I don't think about the wonders that I can accomplish today, I just think about getting the day started with out falling back asleep or yelling at the zoo to hurry up. But every night I know that I may struggle, I may stink, I may just feel down right horrible. But my Heavenly Father loves me and thinks that I measure perfectly. I'm His, He loves me. And I will do my best to make him happy with me His daughter.
So this I say. Like the videos say at the end.
I'm a mother of 5 wonderful children.
I have a happy, and loud home.
I'm a butcher ( mostly with dinner).
A baker.
Sometimes I'm a candlestick maker.
And I'm a Mormon.
So here is the thing I would love to see. Post what you are. What defines you? I'm excited to see them shared with others.

Blah!!

Has anyone ever woken up and was happy? I'm trying to figure out how to do that. Right now is kind of a blah day. It has nothing to do with the weather, it's beautiful out, maybe a little windy but that is par for the course. It has nothing to do with home life. That's good. Nothing to do with the worlds current affairs. Good thing it isn't I don't think that I would ever feel good. It's just sometimes I wake up and despite all that I try to do. I have a Blah Day. You would think that with all the smiley faces I see everyday. That I would never have these days. With all the ballet dancing I do with Bug, and all the snuggle time that I get with the other animals in the Zoo. I would never have a blah day. But today I woke up ( rather early) to a Blah day. And no it is not Monday. I have done my laundry, ( you all know how I feel about that) cleaned my kitchen, had a shower, talked or should I say texted a good friend, danced in the living room. But still that little black rain cloud hangs over my head teasing me that soon it will open up and pour on my head. Huh! I just find this topic very interesting. Why do I sometimes have these kind of days. I'm not sad, I'm just blah. You know just going through the motions of the day. Not really enjoying it and not really hating it. Just living it. So if anyone has advice why I have or we have these kind of days. I would love to know how you deal with it. How do you get out of your blah day and turn it into a Yay day?

Things I pondered today.

Well the day is not even over. But I think my pondering time is all used up. My brain can only ponder for so long then it just shuts down and goes into survival mode. So today I was thinking of a couple of things. One I wish I could swim and think at the same time. I have a friend that is good at swimming that I'm totally inspired by her. She is truly a fish. She's one of those people that make it look really easy. You know the type. You watch them swim or do anything for that matter. And you think to your self " That does not look so hard." Big mistake, huge. Huge! ( Did anyone catch what movie that's from. If you do I'll give you a prize.) So anyway, I have realized that swimming is not that easy. Dang you friend. I wish I could be like her. She can swim and hum at the same time. Me on the other hand, I'm lucky enough if I can remind myself to breathe. So this was my thought. Why do some people easily make things look effortless, and are really good at things. And there are some who just can't figure it out. Well, I think we are all good at everything. It's just not our time yet. I think that yes, we are giving talents here on earth, that are ours, that we are really good at. There are some things that just come really easy. Somethings that we don't have to give alot of effort to and it just comes really easy for us. But do you think that the Lord would only give us some talents and not all of the talents. I have thought about this. Why would he give some people one, and other people tons. I think, that at some point of our learning and growth. So from eternity into eternity, we will be given all talents. We just have to work for them. We are not going to get them all here on earth, but we will be given all. We have already been told that we will inherit all the Father has. I just thought about that. I have to have patients with myself and not look at what other people can do. The wonderful talents they have, and wish my time away wanting what I don't have. I have many talents myself. We all do, but in order to receive more, I must first show that I love and cherish the talents that I have. And then work towards more. The Lord expects us to work, nothing is free. But He also expects us to have patients, with ourselves. President Uchtdorf, said that perfectly. Have patients and compassion with ourselves. Do not stack our weakness against other women's strength. That only leads to sorrow and depression.
Also another thing I thought about. ( Just now actually) Live life to the fullest.
The question is asked "What would you do if everyday you got $86,400?"
I'm sure we could all find things that we would do, things we could buy, and vacations we could take. Now this money does not carry over. It's given in the morning and taken away the next morning with the dawning of a new day. What would you do?
Of course this is a parallel to our day. We are given 86,400 seconds everyday. From sun up to sun up. We can not save seconds for later days, there is no bank that hold time. So now i pose the question " What would you do?" We were so quick to respond when it was something that had some tangible or monetary substance. Yet when it comes to things that we can not see or hold on to, we are stumped. (OK at least I am) There are so many things that I would want to do. Spend more time with my family, with my faith, with my neighbours, with those that need help. So what is stopping my know. Oh I know, ME! If we ( as women) looked at our lives this way, would we be more willing to act. More willing to put caution to the wind, stand up for what is right and use a voice that the world can hear. I think we would. I don't think we would be as timid, as quite, as scared. I'm going to try to see if I can live my life,using every second I have to love, serve, stand up for, cherish, enjoy all those that are around me and all that surrounds me. I have wasted enough time. I have nothing to lose, but the world and eternity to gain.

So I'm going to try some new things. I have a girlfriend that has been getting her nails done this way. They look great. So it is a gel that does not add bulk to the nail. You know when you get gels or acrylics you can no longer pick things up unless you slide them to the edge, or you cant open a can of pop. So these new babies don't add bulk and they last for 3 weeks. Yes 3 weeks, even if your hands are in water almost all the time. So I think I'm going to try it. I need to do some more research and see if I like them. I'm sure that they are going to be fabulous.

So this week is "Bear's" birthday. Well of course you need to have a party. So of course I was on Pinterest ( I'm so addicted). I found this great idea for a cake and a party idea. So the name of the party " You scream, I scream, we all scream for ice cream." Isn't that just the cutest thing ever. So I found party decorating ideas, a fun table scape and some fun game ideas. Now it's just seeing if my dear friend (Gator chomp) will help. The woman is a party planning goddess. I've seen her pictures and they are just "WOW" that's all I can say. Holy moly it's amazing. So I'll have to see if she has time or maybe just show her the idea and she can tell me where to start.

And now for the crowning piece. Yup, hair. I'm totally going to try this on Sunday. I'll let you know if it turns out. I just love the clean, and retro look of it. Very Audrey Hepburn. I love it. I love Audrey. I mean the women just exudes glamour and class. I love doing hair, I love doing makeup. It is one of the things that kind of calm me down. That and running, and playing with the zoo. I also love being with my husband. I really do have a great life. I enjoy being with my family ( sometimes they drive me crazy, but hey I'm human). I have a great family. They are fun, funny, loving, sympathetic, and they adore each other. Daddy Warbucks loves me. I can't complain. He truly loves me and does everything for me and the zoo. He works so hard and we love home too. I'm a very blessed woman. And I thank my Father in Heaven everyday for my many blessings.

Something Quick

Well I don't think that this is going to be a long post. But who really knows what is going to happen once you start writing. Sometimes there is nothing to say and sometimes it wont stop. I don't know if I make sense but it gives me an outlet. So bear with me.
I'm exhausted! I don't know if anyone else feels this but I'm tired all the time. And no I'm not anemic. Although I don't think that I have ever been tested. Great something else to put on my list to do, go to Doctor to get tested for Iron problems. Anyway, I was wondering if anyone else out there is just as tired. Now I do run a "Zoo" full time. I don't get a break. I also run out side ( that gives me a break from all the running around I do inside with the animals). I try to keep my house clean ( failing at that), keep everyone fed, clothed and clean. Do my church callings ( don't know how well that is going) and trying to make myself a better person. I'm sure that all you mom's out there are saying " Amen". So are we all this tired. I feel that I go to bed exhausted and wake up just as tired. Am I not sleeping, am I running around in my sleep. Am I moving in bed and not knowing. I think that Daddy Warbucks would tell me about that. I just don't know what the deal is. Why am I so tired. I don't want to start taking stimulants to stay awake, but I don't want to feel like Oscar the Grouch by the time 3:oo rolls around and all the animals are home from school. What do I do? I just don't know. Am I the only one that feels this way. I would just love to wake up one morning and feel rejuvenated. Feel like I can conquer the world. Instead I feel like I just got hit with a Mack truck and then being forced to run a Marathon. ( Not that I know what that feels like, but I can guess it would not feel great). I wonder if there is anything out there that would help. I'm sure coffee would, maybe that is why people drink it by the gallons, or maybe colas ( same thing). But I don't want to do that. There has to be something else that I can do. If anyone has suggestions, I'm all ears. ( Okay the three of you, what should I do?)
OK, on another note and totally not in the same book or planet. I read the best quote. My mom has it on a book mark she keeps in her scriptures. It's by Marianne Williamson it reads
" Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a Child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. we were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
Well said. I have found myself shying away, wondering why me. Why was I chosen for such a task. I should look at it as " Here am I, send me." I can do it, I know that I have the strength and ability to stand up to any challenge. That I am supposed to shine. That my light will be magnified when I do what is right. When I show that I am a Child of God. With that knowledge, then I am able to help others and they too will shine and how blindingly beautiful will be the daughters of God. We will be a light unto a cold, dark world. We will bring life to those that seek, happiness to the troubled, strength to the weak, light to the darkened. I will not fear who I am. I am a Daughter of God, I love him and He loves me.
I will shine, and I will shine bright and strong!

Wedding, Flying, and feelings of Peace.

It was a great couple of days. It was a little crazy. Very busy and at times a little stressful. I attended my dear nieces wedding just a couple of days ago. It was an amazing time. She was radiant, and just floating on her very special day. He did not look too bad either. It was just such a wonderful time. The Spirit was so strong as we all gathered together in the Temple to witness her sealing. The words spoken were from the Lord. It was truly an answer to so many prayers. I doubt she will ever know just how many prayers were answered in that little ceremony. I know that my prayer was answered. And I know that it was because it hit me. Once the words were uttered a small thank you escaped my lips and I knew that that was what my soul was searching for. Just thinking back to that wonderful day and time, makes me feel warm and loved inside. I loved it.
And the cake turned our fabulous. It was stressful and had me at times wanting to cry but it just looked so pretty and captured who she is so well. (I'm patting myself on the back, Good job Sandy).
I hate flying. I hate flying. I hate flying. Now I don't hate the actual flying part, I hate the waiting part. You would think that we have come so far in technology and aeronautical advancements. ( I don't even know if that is a word, but when I use it I sound smart) We would be able to get from one place to the next in a some what on time manner. Well, not so much. A 5 hour wait in the airport because some dimwitt decides to do something very stupid on a day that the whole country is in mourning for. I wish some people would use the brains that God gave them to think about what the consequences will be because of their actions. I wish that everyone would look at life through someones Else's eyes. I think we would have a better world. Stop looking out for number one and start thinking about the other 6 billion people out there. Even if we just thought about how our actions or enaction is going to effect our husband, our children, our brothers, sisters, our neighbours. Even the women in front of you at the grocery store. Just a little thought.

Another Sabbath Day

Well it is Sunday. Actually the end of Sunday and it was a good day. Not so good to start out with. Trout got sick, and I mean sick (barf). Do you all know that creepy feeling you get when you think someone is looking at you. Well that happens alot in our house. At night it is more prevalent. You know that feeling ,that there are little eyes watching you as you sleep. Then you wake up and almost have a heart attack, because those little eyes are about an inch from your face. Never a good wake up. So that is what it felt like last night. ( Put scary music here) I had a feeling I was being watched. But I'm such a scardy pants, I did not want to open my eyes. Eventually, I did open them. I was expecting a much smaller shadowy figure looming over my bed. Trout was looking right down at me. But I really could not see that well because there was back lighting. All it looked like was a scary shadow calling my name. All I could think of was " quick crawl under your covers, the shadow will pass, the shadow will pass". Trout was distraught and not feeling well. Daddy Warbucks got up, bless his soul, and helped clean everything up. I am one of those people that get sick just thinking about getting sick. Not good when Daddy Warbucks is travelling and the zoo gets ill. After that wonderful wake up call, the rest of the day was very pleasant.
The Spirit was so very strong in Sacrament today. Wonderful testimonies were borne and a strong stirring was in my heart. I was thinking about Sis. Dalton and her husband. I just finished listening to a conversation on the Mormon channel. Wonderful, I express to all to listen to it. There was something that at that moment stood out to me. She talked about a time that she and her husband were running up a hill, training for a marathon. She felt that she could not carry on and yelled ahead to her husband and said she was giving up and going back to the car. He immediately turned round ran up to her and told her " you never make decisions in the middle of a hill". Interesting. You never make decision in the middle of a hill. In the middle of trial, stress or hardship. You don't make a choice in hast. I have climbed hills in running. Yes, I have given up in the middle. I have felt the bitter sorrow of defeat. The shame that you feel as you walk down knowing that you never made it to the top. It's heart breaking. But on the other hand I have tasted the sweetness of triumph. The thrill that you get when you look back and see what you were able to accomplish. This is how we must face our trials. We must make the choice now, while in good times,{ a flat run} that we are not going to give up in the middle. We will climb the hill. It might not be fast, it may look ugly, but it will be conquered. Then we must surround ourselves with those that will help us along the way. Sister Dalton had her husband at her side as she ran that hill. We must also have someone by us lifting, cheering, reminding, encouraging and at times crying with us. Of course, there are trials in this life that we face alone. Things that we don't want to share, things that are private. We may not have a physical companion but do not think for one moment that Christ is not climbing that hill with you. He knows your heart ache, your pain, your suffering. He has cried tears for you. He has spilled blood from every pore for you, and he knows what is at the top of the hill. He knows the joy, the triumph, the sweetness, the absolute glory that can be found at the top of the hill. And He wants you to make it.
We are never along, we must not give up, we must not quit in the middle of the hill. It will get harder, no doubt about that. But how great will be your joy.

I'm back

Sorry, I've been sick and trying to still get my life organized. I know, organizing ones life is like climbing Everest with out any oxygen. I guess Everest can be conquered with out supplement oxygen, I guess I can organize. It's just one step at a time. Then a really long break to catch my breath.

Some fun things have happened in my absence. Our new house. Yes Daddy Warbucks and I are building a new house. The zoo is getting older and room is needed. What! Really, do we really need more room. I struggle with this. Of course I love pretty things, I love having rooms that I can try (stress try) to keep clean. I love the thought of having an adult room. With pretty things in it that the kids are not to touch cause they can break. But really, to say that the zoo is getting to big to fit in my house right now is joke. There are people in the world that live in considerably smaller places. In places that are built with garbage, in garbage, and they shelter many people. I'm a very blessed woman. I need to remember that. I'm truly blessed with many of the worlds riches. I need to find ways to give back, ways to help those that are in need. And make sure the size of my house or what is in it does not alter my outlook. We are building this house not for ourselves, but for those around us. Those that may, or will come to our door looking for refuge.

The house is coming along, yay! Not just a big hole anymore. It's a big hole with cement. I guess that is better.

Daddy Warbucks and I went to a NFL game. That was fun! ( wish I was feeling better, then it would have been even more fun) One of the cheerleaders is a friend of ours and we got tickets. She asked if I would take some pictures of her in action. So I tried to follow her around the stadium to get the perfect shot. I'm sure I looked like some crazy stalker. Popping up out of now where to take close ups of this cheerleader. HAHA! I'm serious, I felt like a Whack-a-Mole game. Or where's Waldo. but it was fun and I did get some good shots.

That's another things with my day planning experiment ( which by the way crashed and burned, now I need to pick up the pieces and try again, story of my life) I'm going to get any book I can get my hands on and read and teach myself about photography. Now I do not plan on becoming a photographer. I have a dear friend that can do that job and she is great at it. But just good enough that I can take some zoo pics and have them turn out nice. Some fun, abstract that are though provoking. So this might just become the avenue of showing off some of my triumphs and failures.

I want to show that I am a real person. I glimpse of my life through that of the camera. I want to pick up every detail, beautiful or ugly. I don't like hiding behind things. I don't like pretending that I am someone that I'm not. I'm just as normal as everyone else. Maybe even strange. Yes I like to dress up for church. Everyone does, we all put on our finery and come and sit and act like our zoo is perfect. Well I'm here to say I do the same thing. My life is not perfect, most days, I'm lucky to get a shower in. I'm lucky is that day not once did I raise my voice. I'm lucky if I ate a well balanced meal, if I got my laundry done, ( we all know how much I hate laundry) I'm lucky is I did not fall asleep while praying, fall asleep while trying to read my scripture. Fall asleep while trying to read to the zoo. Yes I have pimples on my face, my hair is a wild mess. You can see the pours on my face, I'm not a fantastic driver and sometimes we have pancakes for dinner. I'm real! Don't feel bad if you are too, welcome to the club. I hope that we can all embrace our reality and just enjoy each other and the journey that we are on. I just read a beautiful article a dear friend sent me. We are in this life to practice. Like a piano players practices. We are here to practice living with Heavenly Father. I never though about it that way. I'm not going to be prefect. I don't have to do everything right all the time. I will hit the wrong note, I will get frustrated, irritated. I will stumble and have to play the song of life one hand at a time. But I'm practicing. I'm trying and day by day, I'm improving.

On that note, ( haha) don't forget who you are, and who loves you. And keep practicing.

Day one...and other thoughts

Well it has been day one of the famous, or infamous time experiment. So far so good. A couple things that I have realized. I'm not as busy as I thought I was and I really do drink alot of water. I guess both are good. One, if I have more free time then I thought I can get more done. More opportunities to do other things. More opportunities to serve, read, bake, play, and yes the dreaded clean. I knew that was going to come up. Daddy Warbucks is going to be very happy with that one. Not that I have a dirty house, I do clean and I try to keep up with the zoo. But I must say, sometimes it does get away from me. So I'm sure he will be excited to find that I have more time then I thought and I can spend more time cleaning the house. ( Not very fun, I would rather do something else)
Also I do drink alot of water. I was never worried about that, I just never thought that it was that much. I think I had 10 glasses of H2O. Yes 10. I am just as surprised as you that I have not floated away yet. Lets just say there is alot of throne time. That's just about it. Nothing fantastic or mind shattering happened. I did go to a baby shower with a wonderful lady. I love that she has entered my life. She is so fun and totally genuine. I love being with her. She makes me want to do better. Be a better mom to my kids, a better person to others. She is a great example. Hopefully I don't scare her off with all my crazy going on.
As I was folding laundry. Yup, that was one of my Top 5 to do today. I was listening to Elder David A. Bednar and his wife talking in an interview. It was wonderful. I would love to share what he said about Faith. " Faith is to step into the darkness anticipating that the light will move/appear." I thought that was wonderful. Right now Daddy Warbucks and I are stepping into the darkness. It's scary, it's humbling, it's building our spirits. I have to look at it as was stated. Walk out in the darkness anticipating the light to shine. Very good advice. That is what faith is. Walking with out knowing, but revelation will come after the walk is done.
Off to get the other things on my list done. One is curling my hair with a sock. I will let you know how it turns out. ( Tried it on kangaroo first, I'm a chicken. We will see how it looks)

Lemon WHAT!!!!

OK, a little lighter post. One about dirt. What dirt, odd topic. Actually this is about lemons. Yes our dear friend the lemon. The fruit that is yellow, bumpy, is sour as anything, given to babies gets the best faces possible. And for us that don't like to order drinks in restaurants it makes us feel better when put in our glass of water. ( That last part is so true) Anyway, this little fruit has so much oomph behind it.

Not only does it smell like you just cleaned the house, but if bathed in it or rubbed on ones skin it will fade a self tan job gone bad. ( not that I know anything about that. I lived in Canada, winter lasts a long time. Anything that one can do to make the winter blues go away, one tries) So just recently, I stumbled across a blog(kandeej.com) that said to wash your face with it. What I screamed, that might just work. So of course, me ( the one who gets sucked into buying infomercial products) tried it. Trout thought it was hilarious. Trout walked into my bathroom saw everything out and asked if I was baking in the bathroom. Let's just say I have tried everything, avocado, mayo, honey etc. ( By the way honey is great for clearing up that pesky pimple that snuck up on you in the middle of the night)

So what you do, is take some lemon juice, I used it from concentrate. To cheap to get the real fruit, poured it on a cotton pad. Sprinkled white sugar on it and started scrubbing. My own little sugar exfoliate. My face felt great, so smooth and smelled like I just cleaned the kitchen. HAHA! No really, it worked great. It's supposed to help with pregnancy mask and other dark spots we find on our faces. So try it, it may surprise you. And if not, it will just keep your family wondering if you really are crazy. The jury is still out on that for me.

Computers are only as smart as the user

Well this statement rings so, so true in my life. The last post with the experiment did not save. Nor did the user ( me) check to see if it did save. I'm so very sorry, because in that last paragraph or so I explained the meaning of life and how to navigate through this crazy life. Hahaha. So sorry!
Nah, of course that is not true. I have a glimpse of what the meaning of life is. But I struggle everyday to navigate it. Sorry, no sage advice coming from me.
Anyway. I have no real idea what I said last night ( it was late, and I should have been sleeping) so I will try to recount what was said and at last the experiment.
So what do you want to be? It's more then a career, it's more then just being a mommy. It's who do you want to be. I want to be strong, I want to be wise, I want to be patient, loving, submissive, and endure my trials with my head held high. I want to be a mother who sees a teaching opportunity and takes it. I want to be the mom in the stands that holds up the " Way to Go!" sign for a child's play, sporting event, kindergarten musical. The mom that is always there to kiss the zoo goodbye in the morning and kiss them when they walk in after school. I want to be selfless in service. I want to be a tool in my Saviors hands. So with all these wants, what do I need to do to become what I want to be. Ha! There is a to do list. But it's more then laundry, dishes and picking up. It's praying, studying scripture, praying, praying, praying and then acting.
It took my a while to figure this out. Now I'm not good at it. I'm selfish, I'm lazy, I'm depressed just like he just of the world, but I see that I need to change. That's half the battle. Yesterday with Bug playing by herself on the floor, I took that opportunity to drop everything and play. We played horsey for an hour ( there was a well worn round pattern on the floor and my knees, back and gut hurt after) then came the tracing of feet, hands, faces and anything else we could find. It's was fun. I spent some of the precious time my Father has given me playing with one of his dear children. It's was wonderful being at eye level. Laughing and snuggling. Time, time. That's where the experiment comes in .
So time, why do we ( OK me ) feel that there is not enough time. Well, I think it is due to the fact that I'm horrible at managing it. ( Oh man another flaw, this blog is pulling them all out) Yes I could do a way better job at managing my time. So how to I do it. I don't know, I hoping someone else would tell me. Nah, I think we need to be mindful of the time that we waste. So I'm going to log my time. Yup, just like one logs a budget, a food plan. I'm going to log a time plan. And I'm going to be brutally honest. Yikes, this is going to get even scarier.
I've thought about this for awhile. I need to get my work done before playing. I need to write my jobs down ( make a list) then keep it where I see it all the time. Mark things off when they are done. I feel better seeing lists get shorter. It makes me feel like I accomplished something. That's the key I think, feeling like you did something. Then we want to continue to feel that way. Triumphant! Then at night, I can look back and see all I did and plan for the next day. That's the experiment. Now does it work, hypothesis says that if I stay true to the system, in the days, weeks, months to follow I will be more organized and have time to be who I want to be. Stay tuned to see what the daily variables are and the conclusion. ( Science was my best subject haha) Stay tuned. All my readers. And you know who you are cause I only have 3 including myself. HAHAHA!

Who do you want to be and an experiment

I woke up this morning ready to get to work. Trout had to be out the door early for school. (Yikes it's hard waking up before the sun and getting moving) I can tell you now, I am not a morning person. I don't function well in the morning. I wake up and everything is a fog. I don't think that reality hits me until well after I have woken up. Really I don't wake up. I walk around like a mummy. Yes not a mommy, but a zombie mummy. I'm surprised my zoo does not eat me alive. You know animals can smell fear, and lack of power and organization. I'm really surprised they don't eat me for dinner. Anyway, I got moving. breakfast infront of her, lunch being made and of course my grand idea for the day running through my foggy mind. Bug gets up way to early and I snuggle her in my bed ( which happens to be her and my favorite place) and I drift off to a wonderful sleep. Of course like any mom with her own zoo, there are more that have to be woken from slumber ( darn, sometimes they are better sleeping) and fed, brushed, fed again, cleaned and marched out the door to the poor awaiting teachers. ( What a hard job, being a teacher.) I wake up paniced. I have over slept. Ahhhhh! Again animals can smell fear. Hurry, hurry hurry. Out the door we run with shoes not all on, and mom once again in her PJ's taking them to the bus stop. Yes it has happened before and it is only the 4th day of school.


They are off safe and sound. Now time to get things done. Feed the last of the animals, clean and brush. Get some workout time in. ( Glorious) and then back home to finish the mountains, not loads, but mountains of laundry. I joked with friends saying, that if I ever get sentenced to fire and brimstone. Mine will not be fire and brimstone, but LAUNDRY! I'm horrible at laundry, really it is the worst thing on the planet. It never is done. Multiplies before your very eyes and well you know horrible. I digress, I'm faithfully doing laundry, ( not happy about it) and trying to clean the kitchen. Don't even get me started on that rant.


I look over and there is Bug sitting on the floor playing by herself. I recent Confrence talk starts replaying in my head. There is a difference between being and doing. We see ourselves in a doing mode. A check list. How often do we look at life at a being mode. "Who do I want to be?"

A beautiful Sabbath

Today was a great day at church. A couple of things happened.
1. I made it a great day. ( Well not me but the Spirit) but I made a point to go out of my way to visit. No longer am I going to sit on the sidelines waiting for someone to come talk to me. I'm making the first step. I'm making the first smile, the first greeting. I'm no longer going to feel sorry for myself that no one talked to me. I need to be the person that I want others to be to me. It was a great day. I visited with people that I admire and it was genuine. I was letting the Lord speak to me and I was listening.
2. A great lesson given by an amazing woman. I loved what she said about our children. How they learn. They watch, they listen, they mimic. We have such a short time to teach them, to guide them, to help them grow and become strong. We must do our very best to help them. One thing we did talk about was that the adversary has no power over the little children. Until they reach the age of accountability. I was intrigue. The thought popped into my mind about the Armor of God. We as parents are responsible to teach our little ones before they are faced with the war that is raging around us. The Lord has given us this little time where Satan has no power over these little ones. This is there probation, before they are asked to stand and be counted. I thought about our military. They are not thrown out in war with out any instruction. Yes at times it may be small and not that informative. But there is some instruction. There is preparation that takes place. Safe guards set up. Same as teaching our little ones. I'm am helping them prepare. I'm teaching them about how to stay safe. How to fight this war. The question arises " How do we prepare our little ones?" We teach them about the armor that they need. About pray, about scripture study, about making and keeping covenants. But not just teach by our Monday discussions, or what they learn in church on Sunday. But by example. By showing them our well worn armor. By keeping our armor on all the time. Our shields of faith polished and strong. Our swords of truth, sharp and not rusted. We show and teach by example. I envision a mother sitting by her son as he pulled out his armor for the first time. I mother loving sit beside her son as they together polished it. They together looking over the chain mail looking for a weak link. Testing his sword together. I envision a loving mother making sure that the straps are strong. That they are buckled up strong, that they will not fall off. I envision a mother teaching her son how much she loves him. Her hugs, her kisses, her tears as she tells of the suffering that may come, of the pain that will be encountered. But always holding her dear child close and reassuring his safety in her arms. We need to be the mother, the father that helps polish, that helps sharpen, that helps strap on the armor their dear Father in Heaven has given them. And always, always hug them and kiss them. Let them know we love them and will always be there for them. We must make sure they are strong, for if we do not and they fall by the sword of the foe, how great will be our sorrow.
This is what I learned. I'm preparing my children for war. I'm helping them learn to stay strong and be safe. To never take that armor off. And in the end to always love them, and help heal the wounds that they will come home with. We have so much to teach them and at times I feel so little time to do it.
My direction is so much clearer. My time is called for. Mine is to teach my children. To dress them for battle. To always fall to my knees for help and thanksgiving. And to love unconditionally. That is who I want to be and who I will stay true to. I love my children. I love the zoo I live in. I love my Savior, He is my light, my anchor. He is why I am here and He is why I want to return. With Him as my teacher, my advisor, I can and will accomplish all that I am asked to do, and I will do it well.

Get to Work

I was listening a couple days ago to a conversation on a podcast. ( I love them, I'm totally hooked. Thanks to a dear friend that told me about them.) Anyway, they were talking about how in the world today with live in, it is constantly changing. We live in a time where there are no morals. Right and wrong are blurred lines that people cross on a daily if not hourly basis. We are being hounded by wolves in sheep's clothing. It is a war. The question was given, how do we live in this world. How do we live in such harrowing times. Elder Bednar recalls something that President Hinkley said. He said " We live in tumultuous times. Lets get to work." How true, we do live in times that are ever changing, and they well not get better. But we know what we are to do, so lets get doing it. Doing that which is right, not in the worlds eyes but in the eyes of our Lord. Lets get to work. I love that new motto... Let's get to work.
On the same hand I need to change my out look on some things. This weekend Daddy Warbucks took myself and the Zoo to a restaurant. This does not happen very often. Not that we don't like eating out, but to invite the zoo is a little daunting of a task and sometimes the food is not worth the money. Really 5 bucks for a grilled cheese sandwich! Sweet heart I can make a whole boat load of grilled cheese for 5 bucks and they would taste better. Anyway.....
We had the best server. His name was Dee. Loved him. He was so kind, loved the kids was a true southern gentlemen. Now "Bug" leaned over to me and asked me really quite like, "What colour is he." I was taken aback. Could she not see, how was I to answer her. I have never been asked to describe someones colour. It never has occurred to me. So I hesitated. This was going to be a teaching moment. I was going to show that I was not respecter of persons. I was going to teach a lesson. I began to stutter, trying to find just the right words. Bug then looked at me again and said " Mom, come on what colour does he like?" I was shocked. And a child shall lead them... so true is this statement. I was being lead. Bug did not see the colour of skin, the race, the gender, the traits that so quickly we use to judge people by. But saw the person. Saw the soul, wanted to know about that son or daughter of God. I was humbled. I need to look past the outer shell that our souls live in and look deeper. I need to see the child of God in each and everyone of us. And I need to treat that child the way that they deserve to be treated. I'm not saying that I'm horrible, but we all need to look at people through the eyes of a child. We need to see what really is there.
Just a thought
Now get to work!

Friday's Findings

Well today I found out the Mother Nature likes to play tricks. Of course we all know that. Never has a day gone off fully the way that we plan. Yes sometimes she smiles down on us and grants our greates wishes for nice sunny days as we bbq, or play with the kids. But there are times that everything is against us. Literally, wind, rain and lightning in this case. Started the run as usual. I had my camelbak on full of water ( haha little did I know I would not need anymore water then I got dureing this run), my gps/heart rate monitor ( why anyone uses those I have no idea, I really don't want to know that my heart is about to leap out of my chest and I'm going to die. I don't need a watch to tell me that thank you, My heart does a pretty good job telling me itself). After all that is strapped on, wait there is more. My phone/mp3 gets put into place and confrence gets pumped nice and loud through the ear phones. ( I know totally geeky to listen to General confrence as I run, but it soothes the soul and takes me places that I would never go while running. It is a great thing to try. Really I encourage everyone just to try it. You will get sewpt away in the spirit). Ok so by now, I look like I'm ready to infaltrate some hidden bunker somewhere in the jungle, ( Yup just call me Rambo, ok maybe Rambet, cause I'm a girl, haha. Ok only I found that funny). So anyway, I'm ready to go kissed the zoo goodbye and set off with great gusto. This was to be my best run. Well Mother Nature had other plans. To the left dark ominous clouds. That you would find in a horror movie ( good thing no scary music was playing, I would have gone straight home) on the right. a beautiful clear sky. The breeze was pleasent and the air was cool. Well Of course the breezed turned to a wind the sky was englufed with a green blackness and the ears were insulted with distant rumbles of thunder. The rain pounded. I found myself wondering what to do. Do I turn back or find shelter. Nature made that desision for me. Lightning raced across the sky, teasing me. Showing me who the faster one was. The closed the deal I was done. I could feel the energy from that one bolt as it raced high above my head. Time to go in. Of all places I found refuge. A golfcourse clubhouse. ( lightning, golf clubs. ok again I am the only one finding that funny.) I called for help. Got no answer at home so called in the calvary. Grabbed a ride home, kicked off my sloshy wet shoes and socks, and went to go find Daddy Warbucks. Only to find out, my prince in shining armour was out looking for me in the storm. My run ended rather short. Darn! Now do I brave Mother Nature again today. The sun is shinning, the birds are singing and there is a light breeze. I think I may just take the day off and enjoy the zoo that engulfs me. Long story short, I can't control the weather, but I can control what I do with it. Lets go and play with the zoo!

New for me!

So just the other day, Daddy Warbucks offered me a great thing. I got a laptop. I have always wanted something to sit in my kitchen that I have control over. Yes I have control of all the other appliances in the kitchen, stove, dishwasher, mixer and fridge, (lameo) but this. This little toy has so much more fun things to play with then the dishwasher. Sure a dishwasher I can sanitize, and melt plastic. But with this baby, I can create. So already I have downloaded my pictures and photo editing software, ( don't know how to use it but I'm trying). Put security passwords so the animals in our zoo can not get on and have had to troubleshoot things that I have done. I'm so very happy! So yes it is not new and shiny, does not smell like it just came out of a box, and did not come with a great big price tag, but it's new to me. But it does let me create and control. Probably more control. I love having things in the open. I love that my kids can sit in the kitchen with me and play the games on the computer. They can surf the web ( really only the sites that I say they can visit), and it's all in the open. I love not having things to hide. Once things become secret and hidden. The adversary has an easier job, He is able to get into the dark places and speak to our minds. We should have nothing to hide, nothing to shy away from. Our lives should be led that if they made a movie out of it, everyone would be able to see it. Mine would out everyone to sleep, but that is my life.
The story comes back to me that Elder Brown gave a long time ago about the currant bush. "I'm the Gardner here". Well like him I'm the Gatekeeper here. I know what I want in my house and what I want out of my house. I will stand guard, I will be vigilant and yes my kids may lead a G rated life in my home. But it will be full of peace, joy, bumps and bruises. laughter and tears, but it will be a good life. It will be safe.
Again I love my new computer, where is sits in our house and what I'm able to do with it. Hopefully more creations to come.

( I have no idea what happened with the last post. I was playing with a fashion site and something with posting went really bad. Sorry. Why am I apologizing. I'm the only one reading this. Haha)

date night

date night by jamiemonster featuring knit shirts

Silk top
€189 - farfetch.com

Old Navy knit shirt
$43 - oldnavy.gap.com

Boot cut jeans
£14 - peacocks.co.uk

Zara jelly shoes
$60 - zara.com

Isabel Marant opal jewelry
$175 - net-a-porter.com

Urban Outfitters enamel jewelry
$14 - urbanoutfitters.com

park fun

park fun by jamiemonster featuring bow earrings

Phase Eight cotton blouse
£32 - houseoffraser.co.uk

Oasis vintage skirt
£20 - oasis-stores.com

Wet Seal flat shoes
$17 - wetseal.com

Bow earrings
$28 - simplysoles.com

My Thoughts

It's interesting how much perspective plays in the way we deal with life. Not everyone has the same perspective. I know it's one of those "duh" moments. Of course no one has the same way of looking at a problem, or the same way with dealing with a problem. So it's amazing to me that we think that others are in the wrong when we don't like their perspective. I have found myself in that place many times, and now I'm just figuring it out. I think we would be a more delight some people if we could just step back and look at the situation through another persons eyes. Sit back and try to feel what they are feeling, what bothers them, what gets under their skin and how they like to be treated. And yes this did not just occur to me, that I should be doing this. I have just noticed how difficult this truly is. How hard it is to put aside the way we want things to be. The way that we want to see things. The way we want situations to be handled. Sometimes we really do need to walk in someone else shoes to get the clear picture. Some of us are looking at trials from the back, some from the sides. Some of us are looking at them like they are not our problems. Or maybe some of us are looking at them and not seeing them. For me, sometimes I look at them from the inside. Where you feel like your drowning. Right in the middle, finding no way out. I think that if we took a step back, up, sideways, in our even out. We would see things for what they truly are. We would see things that we never saw before. Ways to help, to serve, to heal, to strengthen. Ways to stand taller and stronger. It takes a lot of humility to be able to step back and admit that maybe we have done something wrong. Something that we precieved was right, but really wrong and did not help the situation. For me that is still a work in progress. Now how do we do it? That is the million dollar question. How do we step back, how do we regroup. My sister said something today that struck a chord. We pray. We pray for guidance. We pray for strength. We pray for understanding. I think that is really how we fix this problem. We find answers when we are humble. And most times for me that is when I'm on my knees praying to my Father and admitting my faults and pleading for help. Just a thought.

Friday's Findings

Well it's Friday once more. Not a lot to think about today. Was too busy getting 48 lbs of strawberries ready for the freezer. That's a whole lot of berries. I think it took me several hours. Keep in mind that in those several hours I had to stop 2 wars, feed an army, clean up after the army. Keep millions of hands out of berries. And discuss life's mysteries with my dearest husband. So not much to talk or think about today.


Although these berries look and tasted amazing. All the effort that went into getting them ready for the freezer and later in jars for jam was worth every hour. And every finger nail that has turned bright red after cutting all the berries. Ha ha!

Friday Findings

Somethings that I have thought about today and may be deep and intelligent or really just might be funny and really not important.

Bar soap is a really good cleaner.
As much as we don't want to hear it, but good ol bar soap can be the best facial cleaner there is. Yes I know that we all love the lotions and potions that we put on our faces. We love the way they smell, the way the feel. The ways the wrinkles disappear when we use them. (Ok maybe not that one). But sometimes it's good to back to the basics. Now that said I am still on the search for the best ever face wash, lotion, and fountain of youth as the next woman. It's just something that I have found out.(Of course had to use soap, cause I was to lazy to pull out the potions. What do ya know my face is clearing up. Haha!)

Laundry never ends
I thought that I was totally caught up. Yup I thought I had beat that monster. You know that one I'm talking about. It lurks every where. In closets, bathrooms, corners, under beds. In my case in the trunk of my car. Well It grew while I was not looking. It grabbed me with it's mismatched talons (socks) and drug me down to the fiery pit of despair. (That would be the laundry room). Now I'm stuck! Oh poop!

I can only change the way I act.
I wish that I could change the way people acted. But alas the world would be a horrible place if I could. We are all so very different. I have no control of what people do, say or perceive things. The only thing I have control on is how I act, what I do and how I perceive things. It's hard to deal with. At times you want to scream and show the many faults you feel peole have. But that is not my job. ( nor do I want it to be) I choose to take everything in stride. Some times my stride shortens and it stumbles, sometimes it lengthens so that I can get away faster. But that's my choice. I choose to face things head on. may cry in the background when the lights are down, but I will change for the better.

A clean house is a Happy House
WHAT! Did I just say that. Yes I love a clean house. It looks so inviting. That being said maybe my house is messy sot hat people don't feel invited to stay. It's easier to feel the promptings of the Spirit when there is now clutter. No clutter not he tables, counters etc. With that gone we can focus on decluttereing our minds. A clean mind is one that is used for good. One the Savior is able to talk to. One that he is able to use to help His children that need. With that said timer o clean my house.

Kid = Noise
I'm not talking about goats. Although goats are noisy too. For some reason children are noise makers. They don't seem to have a level. Well they do the only level they have is loud. Especially when their cream falls on the ground. It does not matter how many you have. One to one hundred they are noisy. Embrace the sound. Soon it won't be there and then what, The haunting sound of silence. On that note have fum!

Exercise is to be therapeutic
Ok, who ever came up with that idea is a ding dong. I have never met someone while in a spin class, warrior one or running a marathon say in the middle of the moment. " Man this is so therapeutic. I'm on cloud nine. I wish I could do this all day." Now that being said. I do like a good workout. I may not like it in the beginning or the middle but the end is great. Wether running, swimming ( although I'm always worried about something attacking me. And yes I do swim in a pool. Something could come up through the jets and attack me. haha), lifting. It does clear the head bit and put things back in perspective. Things could always be worse. Like a big huge hill at the end of run WHAT! Or a swimsuit malfunction in the middle of a lap. Or big sweaty guy using the weight bench before you and not cleaning it. ( Yucka!) So it is true exercise in the end is therapeutic. Not in the beginning or the middle but it sure feels great to be done. Haha!

I may not be perfect, but parts of me are fantastic
This statement is soooooo true. Yes none of us are perfect. But we do have parts that are fantastic. I don't like the way my body looks. There are spots that I feel are not pretty, or clear enough, bright enough or places that are a bit wobbly or bent. But I really do have fantastic hair. I have pretty fantastic eyebrows. I think we look at ourselves with a lot of disdain. We pick our selves apart. We nit pick, we distort, we look at our selves though fun house mirrors. Yes there may be something we don't like or wish was better. But lets dwell on the things that are fantastic. Your smile, your hair, your positive attitude, your comforting arms. your twinkly eyes. your charm. your voice. These are the fantastic things. Everyone has something that is great. The more we dwell on the fantastic the more we see. And the more perfect we become.